Helping out a newbie..... bought a pup from me..bitch...bred her..with agreement that I would get a puppy back....not happy with pup back.....what would you do?????????? Don't want to rock the boat, as she has become a friend of mine but isn't interested in showing??????
Is the issue that she was supposed to be sending you "pick" and she didn't......or she told you she had a nice one for you and as soon as you got it you realized otherwise??? Or was there just nothing all that good, or did you pick out the pup at 8 weeks and after a couple months, it just isn't turning out?
Sounds like she held up her end of the agreement. Not all litters have what we want. Did you pick the stud dog? Maybe tell her there is not a pup you would like to keep from this litter and may like to buy a pup from your co-owned bitch from another litter in the future; she may offer one from another if you are good friends and just sell this pup.
Okay, don't understand completely. She is not happy with giving you a pup back ? Plus she was suppose to show girl in your agreement and has not? Or you don't like the looks of the pup. Just take it and sell it. She owes you back.
Sometimes the dogs you sell or pups you get back just is not correct. Even if it was from breading best to the best. We have to understand all is a gamble. No ones fault. Some just don't work out. I have lost a friendship over a bitch. Very sad.
Not clear on the agreement or circumstances, but if there's a friendship and a concern that any actions taken might upset the friendship, then just treat as you'd want to be treated if the situation was reversed. Do the courteous thing if the friendship means something to both of you... might just be a little communication is all that's needed and that would probably be appreciated.
That is the problem for me. If the pick is the pup the person fell in love with & now the pup doesn't measure up, it can be very difficult. It looks like you should really sell the puppy, but offer her to your friend first.
Sometimes, even when you do treat someone as you would expect to be treated, that's not good enough for them and they still feel slighted.
Sad, but you really find out who people are and sometimes it's not good.
Especially newbies, who don't yet understand, or care to, how things in the dog show world work. For example, in your case, selling a pup they gave you because it's not good enough.
They don't get it.
They get too emotional about how seasoned breeders handle things and they they show their true colors.
By "not happy with pup back" it isn't clear whether you're not happy with the pup you got or your friend isn't happy about giving you a pup back. If it is the latter, perhaps you should have had your agreement in writing. I always have everything in writing not because of lack of trust but because one party or the other is likely to forget the exact terms of the agreement and be unhappy.
If that is not the case, you have to decide whether the puppy or the friendship is most important to you and act accordingly. Puppies can be replaced but true friends aren't so easy to come by....
Julie
how old is this pup , is it possible this pup could make a nice brood bitch and then maybe get a better pup after breeding her. there not all show but some are definately worth thinking about as a brood bitch for the next generation. what you had hoped for in her might have skipped a generation is coming thur her....you never know but food for thought.
"Sometimes, even when you do treat someone as you would expect to be treated, that's not good enough for them and they still feel slighted."
Well, then you did all that you could if you were up front and kept communication open and did nothing behind their back, maybe even went the extra mile by being courteous. And and least you could go to sleep at night with a clear concience knowing you did all you could to preserve the friendship AND act ethically in the dog world, even though the unwritten rules are in the gray area.
Maybe I take things to heart to much sometimes, but one thing I will always remember and made an impression in the dog world and I don't expect it should be so hard that others can't live up to it so I do expect it of my "friends"... not asking much IMO. When I was a member of the NLRC, there was a line at the closing of their code of ethics. It went somethiing to the effect that when dealing with a matter not covered by these guidelines (referring to the code of ethics), remember to treat as you would want to be treated.
"Speaking of NLRC, I have a very bad memory of how I was treated by "someone" when I tried to join Val :)"
Sorry to hear about your experience. I had no bad experiences with the NLRC. Memory is vague now on it, but I seem to recall that there was a grievance process in place or one was to be implemented, but you'd have to contact one of the directors or officers to inquire.
If by chance your experience was in applying to be listed in the web site Breeder Directory, I do remember there were specific conditions applying to listings.
"It was the way I was treated by a very officious person Val. BTW--how is that club doing?"
Again, I'm sorry for your experience. Not the place here to discuss it, nor am I the one to address about the issue... but I have to say in all the years I was involved with the club, I knew the Membership Chairperson to put a lot of hard work and time volunteering in that position and worked with her on at least one committee and found her very cordial.
I'm sure there are members and Officers of the NLRC who read this forum, so maybe they'll give an update on the club, since there's interest, under a new thread.