Please feel free to join our School Refuser message forum discussions. If you have experience of school refusing, you may find it appropriate to respond to previous posts. Or you may be feeling isolated and wish to express your feelings. Whatever, your contribtions are welocme.
So glad you found us! It was a life saver for me when I found the site many years back after Simon set it up.
You are not alone - and yes, it is a tough journey. There is no one answer - and so I can only also offer suggestions from my experience of the forum (I now oversee) and my own experience with my son.
Medication did help my son. Unfortunately he didn't get onto the medication that worked until we had struggled through the school system for years and years. It allowed him to attend a college and pass his year 11 schooling last year. He missed a lot...but attended enough to get through.
I wonder if you put pressure back on the school to provide an education for your daughter - they might provide the tutoring which is actually written into the UK education policy but most schools choose not to act on it as they are unsure how to class mental health. But the wording is if there is a health issue whether physical or mental. So in that case - schools should be either sending work home or providing tutoring. Perhaps make some enquiries. It might be what your daughter needs to keep in the loop. Explain to the school that getting left behind is not going to get her into school.
Hang in there - you are a good mum and doing all you can in very trying circumstances!
Just to update you all. My son has been on Prozac 20mg for at least a term and it has helped him to go back to school. He still has had a couple of hiccups but got over them quickly. The other thing that is helping him is giving rewards for going to school but that is expensive and I don’t think its healthy in a way if you do it too much but sometimes theres no other way.
That is good news indeed! Thanks so much for letting us know. Don't feel guilty about the rewards - some times you just have to do what you have to do!
Others can perhaps gain some strength and hope from your update. We never got to try Prozac but the research that was being conducted in our city were using Prozac coupled with Cognitive behaviour therapy. At the time, my son had not been out of school for three months in a row so did not qualify for the program unfortunately!
Just wondered how you are getting on with your daughter? My son is a school refuser and we are still waiting to see CAMHS in order for him to get the support he needs. His school also refuses to issue work unless he can try to get into school.