I have just discovered this site - unfortunately I have found nothing like this in Australia! I have been struggling with my 10 year old son with school refusal for the past five years. This refusal also shows up in some situations outside school if he misses, for example, a few weeks of a sport or other activity. I don't feel so alone when I read about others who also experience the anger outbursts - the tears - the illness - the terribly distraught child. Its nice to know that I'm not the only one sitting on edge every morning - just never quite knowing if its a good or a bad day. Some teachers seem to think I am just too soft on him and are not very helpful in helping him catch up with work. Some days I do just have to let him stay home as i am too exhausted to fight but I mostly somehow through the yelling and tears manage to get him there. Once there he seems to go ok. After what we have already been through I am hoping to improve the situation before secondary school! We are about to work with a cognitive behavior psychologist and would be interested to hear from others who have found this therapy particularly useful and whether it works well with any age child.

Hi Linda,

Welcome! You'll make lots of friends on here and find the support you need. This site has saved my life! Everyone is so lovely, hopefully you won't feel alone anymore. (Thank you Simon!)

My daughter had counselling from Year 7 (age 11/12). It wasn't all CBT but it was involved to a certain extent. My daughter felt it helped her, she said it was good to talk to someone and I noticed a change in her self confidence. She is in Year 11 now and has recently stopped the counselling of her own accord, she felt she had come as far as she could. I feel it was a good thing for her, it made her look at things from a different perpective and try to react differently. She learned to write down her feelings and thoughts and she still does this, especially when she has low days.

I'm not sure if it will help your son, but anything is worth a try.

Keep smiling, you'll get through it.

Sue x

welcome to the site, hope you find the support here that you need.
We tried CBT for our son and whilst it seemed to work at the time, when the therapist stopped working with our son then he was back to square one. I think you should try it with an open mind, there are other people on this site who have felt it has worked well with their children.

Take care
Dorothy x

Hi Sue and Dorothy,

Lovely to have such a quick reply and thank you for your support. Its so nice to at last have others out there who know what I am talking about!
I look forward to hearing further input from the forum regarding cognitive behaviour therapy. Thanks again - trying to cope alone starts to feel like the world has turned upside down- sharing and listening and helping others has come as a great relief.
Linda

Hello Linda,
I am so glad you have found us.

I would really like to try CBT for my daughter but she is resistant to any help at the moment. She sees a 'play' therapist whom my daughter just humours for the 45minutes and comes out saying its a waste of time but that is because she is not willing to access their suggestions.

I do think that trying to change negative thought patterns is such a positive thing to do and I really hope it works for your son.

Keep in touch and let us know how it goes.

Penny x

Hi Linda

Isn't it wonderful to know you are not on your own - it certainly helps. I will always be grateful to Simon for starting the forum and feel as though we are all great friends.

I would be interested on CBT. My son feels hypnosis has helped him - it is no miracle cure but from not going out of the house at all to now attending a small unit 2x a week for lessons and going out to play footie with his friends i do think it has helped. ( don't get me wrong he still can't go out of the door without his medication ) To be honest I can't ever see him going back to school but as long as he continues his home education and sees his friends and is happy then I can't ask for any more now.

Keep your chin up

Sarah