Just thinking about what someone from CAMHS said to me last week that the start of the school year is the best time to go back to school cos everyone has been off for 6 weeks.

I'd love my daughter to go back to school next Friday (year 10) but I'm being realistic about this. I'm not sure how much to " push it" or when to start talking about her going back to school.

Any advice out there?

Hi Daz

Our schools started a few weeks ago, in Scotland, I tried to talk to my son a few days before the term started, but all he would say was " I want to enjoy the jast few days of the holidays" I said to him, wouldn't it be great if you could start school with everyone else, his reply was, " in an ideal world........................." I'm sorry Daz, but I don't know the answer to this one, experience has taught me that no matter what our children say, and they do mean it at the time, on the day it can be so different, I think you need to go with your instincts, but have an open mind, I'm sure you are starting to get stressed about it, I know I was, but just think how stressed our children must be feeling.

Take care
Dorothy x

Hi Dazza,

Try mentioning - but don't have high expectations? Nothing to loose either way?
I have managed to get my son to school on the first day - and some years the first week - by arranging that he walk to school with a friend (easier to do when they are younger, I know...). That first day of arriving on your own and not knowing where your friends are or who goes where can be off putting for the majority of kids. There is also a bit of peer pressure there. He then usually goes reasonably well for the first couple of days and then, exhausted - finds day 3 almost impossible. But at least he has checked out the other kids - the rooms- the teacher etc. That makes it a bit easier to then go again the following week. Worth a try - that first day is pretty important for everyone - but...also the hardest for our kids. It's not easy - but good luck.
Linda

Hi Daz,

I found it best to just mention school but Daz dont dwell on it or push her to go, it will just increase her anxieties.

I used to get my daughter to invite her friend over nearer the time and then mention school and see if they could arrange meeting up the first morning and going in together. It didnt always work but it may be worth a try.

Please dont push too much or talk about school constantly, I'm sure your daughter is well aware that the first day of school is approaching. You have CAHMS to help you now, they will give you all the advice you need, relevant to your daughter hopefully.

Small steps!

Take care.

Sue x

Hi Daz - how did it go today ? Did your daughter manage to go to school ? My son is due to start year 10 on Tuesday - and to say im starting to get anxious is an understatement. Having had 6 weeks of no stress has been wonderful wish it would never end. Just thinking about things and people on the forum i wonder if any of our children go to the same school ? Obviously non of us will reveal details but it would be interesting to know. My youngest son is due to start the same school on Tuesday as well and he has said how excited he is, I just hope that if all goes "belly up" with my SR son it doesn't put no 2 son off with the upset.

Hayho - going to make the most of this weekend and lets see what next week brings.

Looking forward to communicating with you all in the new school year.

Love to all

Sar xx

We are all different and we all approach life from a different perspective - well, almost. Life does not actually like us being different; it wants to broadbrush us, put us into categories, make us do things we are not ready do, because that is what 'everyone else' is doing. But often, we do just want to be like everyone else, even when it is not right for us.

But we are different, and so we need to recognise that a younger son may not see life in the same way as a older son. If he recognises that his sibling is ill, or struggling emotionally, then he still needs to get on with his own life. This should not spoil friendships, it should not spark jealousy so long as there is space for these differences to be examined and understood.

Your son sounds as if he is ready for his new school (Is it what I call 'the big school'?) He will make is own circle of friends and make his own impact on his teachers, who will all see him for what he is, not for what someone else is.

Your older son might find this difficult, but will probably be too wrapped up in his own concerns, and the effort that he will be making. And I am sure you will give everyone the attention they need, and deserve!

Meanwhile, you just have to stay cool, calm and carbolic, as my cadet sergeant major used to say. It is a nerve racking time, isn't it? (college starts on Monday for my daughter)

Simon

PS Oh dear! That reads like a lecture! It was meant to be encouraging.

My daughter hasn't been to school today not that I thought she would.

The head of year called yesterday to make an appointment to see us at our house next week after CAMHS wrote to them so obviously they weren't expecting her to come in.

I agree that we shouldn't say the schools our kids attend but I don't mind saying we live in West Yorkshire.

Hi Daz, Simon, Dorothy and everyone else starting a new year,

All the best. Seems like you will have to work with where your daughter is now, Daz. My son has met the new CB therapist and is willing to go back again - so I'm feeling more hopeful right now. He's also gone to school for two weeks in a row....what makes these two weeks different? Was there something more engaging at the school end or is it because he can see that we are not long away from the end of term....who knows!!! I know exactly how you are all feeling and am thinking of you. And thanks to those of you who still checked the forum whilst you were on holidays - I really appreciated the support.
Linda

Hi all - Daz im in the midlands so quite far away. Well Tuesday is fast approaching and so is my anxiety about what is going to happen. My son is still adament he is going to go but ive heard it so many times to be honest. Son 2 is so laid back about it all he hasnt even arranged to meet his friends yet - lastminute.com just another day to him which is a refreshing attitude. Well going to make the most of tomorrow and see what Tuesday brings.

good luck to all


Sarah xx

Hi, I'm in Hertfordshire.
my daughter made it into school on the the 1st, 4th and 5th day this week but had to go to bed at 4oclock on those afternoons because she was exhausted. She is re taking year 11 this year.