We had the meeting today with the school principal, class teacher, psychologist (CBT) and me(principal took notes which he said he will email to us all). My son was not able to attend. He has been sick all week so he either had to force himself to attend school and then go to the meeting or go with me and feel 'stupid' as either way he felt his mates would ask what was going on. Our kids really need neutral ground for meetings, don't they!
The psychologist was great - she outlined the whole issue well and explained how serious it was and how I was doing all I could to get him there but they had to understand that there will be days when from sheer exhaustion of trying when I just can't get him there. They are going to try and set up email contact with one of his friends in the class who he has had as his group partner and is a very responsible and understanding kid. Then during group work - this boy and Aden can communicate direct via email and work on their projects. I can also access the weeks planning via the ultranet within the school.

This sounds really good to me and the first time we have had any positive input given to the school to work 'with' us. Every other counsellor has taken more the approach that my son doesn't like school or I need to be firmer. But this psychologist was emphasising that my son had trouble separating from his comfort zone. The principal then immediatelly said he understood why my son also found interschool sports so hard as it was leaving two comfort zones - home and then school to go out to another school. Pity it is his last year at this school as I believe they are all just beginning to understand. I am sure we will have to go through the whole thing again when he starts secondary school.

My son is also happy with the outcome of the meeting and was so glad to hear how positive the meeting was. They are arranging another one for next term to try and get my son to attend too.
The teacher thought that his mates knowing what was happening might help on the sympathy scale instead of giving him a hard time for being away so much. We thought it best to talk to my son about this but it is an interesting point. How much can you tell kids at the school and how much is too much that some individuals will then use it against them? I know some on the forum have had this happen at secondary school anyway (I think the least the peers know the better at that age!!).

I learnt that the school works through CAMHS here too (I thought it was a UK thing as you all mention it so much on here). I think what happened was that I began seeking private help before the school had a chance to refer me to CAMHS although the original psychologist we saw who was quite awful was from CAMHS evidently. Anyway - you learn something new every day with this process!
Good luck to all who now have holidays and those who don't - hopefully you have Easter to look forward to soon. We are soooooooo glad it is now holidays - looking forward to hopefully a more positive term 2.
best wishes to all who have been here to listen
Linda

Hi Linda,

I'm so pleased that your meeting went well. The sence of euphoria after a successful meeting is amazing isnt it?

A positive move forward for you and your son hopefully. At least you are 'in the system' and it may just follow through to the next school, who knows.

I wish you luck and happy holidays.

Smiles!

Sue and M.