Have any of you ever seen a film/documentary about an autistic boy called 'The Horse Boy'? It was on our tv here the other night - very moving even if you don't believe in the spiritual influence from their trip to Mongolia - the things they discovered about themselves and their child were very significant to all kids that do not fit what our society wants to be the 'norm'.

Some of the experts who speak on this documentary also have some important insight that is relevant to SR. The main thing that came across was as parents we have to accept what our children are and that they all have a place in our community that has to be recognised. And the individual child can blossom, given the right support and circumstances.

In this instance it was the child's beautiful/calming relationship with horses and the parents have used this to develop the child and other children in so many ways. A very positive documentary about children who are different. And it left it open to actually say whether or not children who have autism can be able to live well in the community - but the suggestion was that we all can live well in our community if the community becomes more accepting of all differences. I know our kids might not have autism - but some of the issues they face do overlap.
Linda

Hi - no i not come across it but sounds so interesting. Hillie, wow your reply moved me, yes we have to celebrate what we have and if they do not fit the norm then so be it. I think i am quite guilty at times for not giving my son enought credit for what he actually does do, and how far he has come over the last 4 years. He has never been in trouble in or out of school, never given me any grief apart from his SR, is a loving and respectful boy and i always know where he is - not that he goes out much so reflecting on it all i have fantastic boy !! I know some parents whose children go to school but are in so much trouble - which one would i rather have ?? I am working from home today as M is doing a mock exam paper so i am going to make sure he gets as much praise as possible. Don't get me wrong i am not dismissive of him at all but need to accept him for what he is a little more. I think all of us lose sight of this at times as we are so wrapped up in SR.

Sar x

I think it's a case of putting aside all those dreams we secretly harboured as expectant mums where our children were going to manage to create world peace and all that other guff and realising they are who they are and loving them for that. There is no 'normal', there should be no standards to be measured against. We are all unique and we are all special in our own way. Some people have more difficulty living in a social society - so what? Who says we should have to? The 'normal' people? I work with children with autism - each unique and each special and I wouldn't have them any other way. Some of the most frustrating of days have been not because of their inability to, for example, communicate, but because of my inability to understand. Being asked to go into an assembly and kicking over a chair instead was not down to the child's inability to communicate but my lack of understanding about what going into a situation like that would feel like.

Hils x

I have the upmost respect for professionals who work with children who have special needs i really do. Had quite a chat with my son this morning and he opened up alot about what started his SR, what frightened him about school etc, only to be interupted by the school phoning as son no2 had had an accident. A&E for 4 hours and need to see a specialist tomorrow - my anxieties are now running at an all time high about what they will say.

Sar x

Hi sarah,

What a roller coaster ride! Don' t feel guilty (easier said than done I know) - both your boys are unique individuals too - it is the 'others' that make you feel guilty and worry about what they will think.
Hope all works out ok
Take care
Linda

HI Hillie


THat is interesting that you work with children with autism. You would definitely find the film 'The Horse Boy' interesting and uplifting. Here is a site with a trailer to the film and information of where you can buy the DVD in the UK and elsewhere.
It is well worth us all watching as it is the emphasis on us all being unique individuals that comes across and how we seem to have lost that somehow.

I also find that there are sometimes similarities between my son and SR. The dislike of sudden loud noises, bright lights, big crowds and unpredictability (which school unfortunately is). People tell me that school mirrors the community and kids have to learn to face such unpredictability to be resilient but in fact the community is not quite the same - it has less expectations on a daily basis and there are jobs that are also less demanding where you can be more of your own boss. So school to me the way it is set up in most mainstream schools - does not cater for individual differences. Here in Australia we were heading more in that direction when I first started teachng and the school I was at particularly embraced this. I saw kids just emerge in this environment (secondary school) but later taught at a school where it was all conformity and as a result - I rarely saw the kids able to stand out as individuals or find their place. I could rave on more - I think my frustration as a teacher is showing in relation to SR!! I no longer teach and believe the system has changed for the worse here and it seems that assessment and testing rules the classroom.
THe link to the film...
http://www.horseboymovie.com/Film.php

Linda

sarah
hope everything goes alright with son no2 lets hope that now your son has started to talk to you he will be able to carry on if not he may just need time again.
best wishes
jennifer

Hi well that was another 3 hours at thee hospital with a follow up appointment with another consultant in a weeks time. We got back from our appointment about 1.30pm and just finished lunch so not worth taking him back to school ( and i feel guilty !! why !! ) SR son has his tutor with him so i am going to put my feet up for an hour the first time in ages.

Hope everyone is OK Sarah xx