Finally a site where people understand what SR is. My daughter will be 10 in a few months. Last March after being home for a week with Strep throat she started to refuse to go to school. She had been bullied in 2nd and part of third grade. She is now in fourth grade and claims that is not the reason, says she does not know why. She has not been in school since Oct 31. 2011. Trying to get home instruction back,as the school stopped it as sometimes she would not cooperate. She is bright and is currently seeing a psychologist who does CBT. She has been diagnoised with general anxiety disorder. Its so hard seeing her go thru this, but I see now that it is not so uncommon. Glad I found this forum, we are from New Jersey.[ Best wishes to everyone.

Hi Grace - i am glad you have found us and will get lots of support as we understand. With SR they can be very unco-operative in any situation, we go through days when all is good, then something will happen and we go back to square one.

Im not sure how it works in Jersey, but do you have an Eduaction Welfare Officer ? What are the school saying/doing about the situation ?

Take care, and keep posting

Love Sar x

Hi Sarah,
First day that school starts here after school vacation. The psychologist wants us to have her up every morning as if she were going to school. Its 8:50 am here and she still is in bed ,won't get up . I will try again in a few minutes. The psych is coming today at noon-she started coming to the house a few weeks ago for her session to try and motivate her, so far the same.
As far as school, my husband and i went to the school after they pulled the home schooling, now they referred me to someone who I am to meet tomorrow night. Not sure if it will be thru the school or private, I hope it works out. I also have a tutor that I got privately coming to tutor her. Hopefully she cooperates. When she does, its great , when she doesn't-there is nothing I can do to get her downstairs-. Thanks for your support, I am also going to look into an education center or something as an alternative. Actually my cousin's son went thru something simialr many years ago, he was older in 9th grade. HIs school really worked with them and they sent him for a 5 months to an alternative place -he than went aback to his regular school.
Sorry for the long post---Thanks,
Grace

Hi Grace,

Glad you found the site. Everyone on here is very supportive. It is hard, isn't it, when they won't cooperate. Probably the anxiety has to be dealt with before they will do the school work. I know my son refuses to do work at home too. Luckily for us he was going better for some time and averaging 2-3 days a week. He starts high school in a few weeks time though...so might be a different story. My son was also diagnosed with general anxiety disorder but they also said he had separation anxiety from his comfort zone as a result.
Hope you can get something happening soon. Let us know how the meeting goes.
Linda

Hi
Well the meeting went well--the tutor they sent over was very nice, a man about 30 yrs old. Apparently he has alot of experience with children with different situations,disabilities, etc. My daughter came down to meet him, said she liked him and he seemed fun.
I know that doesn't mean its going to be all rosy-lets see how it goes when he comes on Saturday. He coaches but hopefully he can come 3-4 times a week.
This afternoon before meeting him, she told me to fire him, leave her alone and get out of her room.
Than she started to cry. I assured her everything would be ok and i would be there for her every step of the way, than we played a game and did her homework. The behavior is just quite unpredictable.
I guess one day at a time.

Hi Grace,

So glad the meeting went well. Fingers crossed for the tutor. My son got himself very worked up when we had a tutor come. I think they are either afraid of someone judging them or afraid of failure or just afraid! That makes life very unpredictable for them and us. You sound like you are doing all the best possible things - so hope you can progress. Let us know how the tutor goes.
All the best,
Linda

Well thankfully my daughter finally came downstairs when the tutor came this past Saturday. It was touch and go for awhile, think she was nervous about the Math as she has missed so much of school. He's very good and got an hour out of her. Just stressful as each time I don't know what to expect. I am wondering if the home instruction is enough for her to get the allowed time in without attending shcool. This morning my husband and I are going to look at the other elementary school in our town-they think a fresh start may help-(I know at this point I can't get her into any school building). Even though her grades were excellent while in school they want to try a spec ed class at this school that has about 6 students, still give her regular work at her level and more her into regular once she feels comfortable. I don't know-I'd be willing to try if I could just get her there. The other day I felt so bad, she was telling me how she hates being in this position, not going to school, and having these fighting feelings inside. I look back at her old report cards at the teachers comments, so positive and wonder what went wrong. Hope all are doing well this week.

Grace, I hope the tutoring is still going well. An hour of one 2 one will count more many more hours than in the class room.
We find that our children still seem to do remarkably well considering their circumstances.
I was also impressed that she managed to do homework. It all puts lots of pressure on you, so remember to look after yourself!
Simon

that all sounds so stressful - hope she co operates with the tutor