I am finding it quite hard at times to read some of the threads, the fact that there is still limited help with what is apparent is not an uncommmon problem.

Part of me wants to put it all behind me and forget what we have gone through, and then i will sit and read the messages and just want to cry for you all.

Well a bit of an up and down few months here really = I let my son just chill after he did his GCSE's and not talk about SR - we had several options available to him but for a variety of reasons non of them came to anything and i can understand why when we visited some of the venues !!

Anyway i am delighted to say that my son has enrolled on an IT course, part time and with a mentor. The mentor came to introduce herself this evening, and what a lovely lady who SEEMS to understand but been here before. I must say my son spoke to her very confidently about past problems and future fears, and i have to say i was rather proud to listen to him speak in such a way and doesn't at the moment seemed too fazed about going into a group of about 8 other students, so lets see what Thursday brings.

Stay strong and there is a light at the end of the tunnel, we feel as though alot of the pressure has gone and we can now move forward and you will all get there too.

Sar x

Hi Sarah,

It is really nice of you to pop by onto the forum even though you are out the other end. We really appreciate any of your help from your own experience. I know what you mean by making you sad reading the same stories over again - I feel the same - and even thought I'd be just offering help by now....but not the case!

What is the mentor system you mention? Did you have to apply for that? What is their role or how did they get asigned to your son? I have noticed there is a mentor system here but know nothing about it and I am not sure where and how it operates.
One thing we are all lacking is cohesion in terms of welfare. The whole welfare of kids is so ad hoc that our child could be past school age before we even know a support service existed.

WEll done to your son ...that is great news re the IT. How is your other son doing now?
HOpe all is well with your family too
Take care,
Linda xx

Sarah thanks so much for your validation and reassurance also the reminder that there is another side to all of this even if we are in the thick of it right now.

From my experience so far, understanding and support for SR's and their families from mainstream systems is poor at best. But we have found people who 'get it' along the way too, for my d it's her acupressurist who confirms that she knows from working on d just how much she has been through and how hard her recovery process has been. For me it's my community relations counsellor, I can go to her once every couple of weeks and feel safe and understood and able to rant away to my heart's content.

Great news about your son's IT course, it sounds like he already has a good rapport with his mentor too which can only be a good thing. It's so good to know life gets better as our kids mature and come out the other side of SR & the traumas of school life.

Sarah

I don't come on the site as often as I used to, like yourself I also find it so painful, don't think that will ever go away, but I don't forget the wonderful friends that got me through those dark years, so it's so nice to hear that M is still doing well, hope things with you are good too.

Linda

My heart breaks for you, you have to keep reminding yourself that you are a great mum and one day things will improve.


R is still doing well, getting his driving licence has been great for him and he continues to work part time as a waiter, his next goal is to get a full time job.

Take care
Dorothy x

Hi Dorothy,

Good to hear from you and lovely to know you do pop by sometimes. Good to hear about your son - he really seems to be just getting on with life now?
Hearing from yourself and Sarah does give me hope.
My son has stayed at school today for the whole day - and it is 38 degrees - so I am sure I will pick up a very melted boy soon who will not want to go back tomorrow!! But proud of him for just giving today a go.

And again - so very glad of yours and Sarah's friendship - in those early days I was so incredibly lost and your help and support was very much appreciated.
Take care,
Linda xx

Hi - he mentor hasd been organised via Connexions Career Service and again not sure my son actually fitted into any of the catagories they had, but we came up with this plan and so far so good but i don't want to count my chickens just yet !!

Yes son no 2 is fine, he did have a day off a couple of weeks ago which was border line not well but i gave him the benefit of the doubt even though by lunch he seemed fine. Dad now has been diagnosed with Parkinsons which is a real shame with everything else he has but remains cheerful.

Dorothy - glad R is doing well too and again good to hear from you.

Love to all Sarah x