school refusers

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Motivation to do any school work

Hi everyone

Just wondering if anyone else who has a son/daughter either mostly/partly attending or not attending school also find their son/daughter has no motivation to do the school work?
When my son does get to school - when he comes home - he wants nothing to do with school. THis makes getting assignments and homework done a constant battle. Anyone else find the same?
So I find that not only am I battling the 'getting to school' issue but also the 'doing the schoolwork' issue.
I get the impression all students are different and some really do want to do the work and get to school and others, like my son, would rather never go to school again and never have to do school work.

I think I have brought this up numerous times in the past because I also feel there is a connection between my son's anxiety and not wanting to 'start' or 'finish' work -something to do with his perfectionism. It is better not done at all than not being perfect. Frustrates me no end as I keep thinking ...good...he has gone to school this week....but if he isn't keeping up with the work even when at school - then we go round in circles.

HOpe you are all managing and things are not too difficult this week.
Take care and look after yourselves : )

Re: Motivation to do any school work

Hi Linda,

My son is sometimes like this. In his case it's mainly when he's got demoralised with everything. However, I have met very bright young people who have been so anxious about starting a piece of work that they struggle to make any mark on the paper (or put a character on the computer screen). I can also remember my own feelings about doing homework when at secondary school. I'd usually be ok once I'd started but sometimes would do all kinds of other activities to put off the evil moment.

Is it all subjects, or just those that require essay writing? If my son's got the "rabbit in the headlights" mentality when he just cannot think of how to start writing, I usually try to work with him on an opening sentence and once we've got that, ask him how he thinks he should structure the rest of it, identify the type of writing he is doing and what audience he is aiming for. This usually gets him to move onto the next part of the work but he may need to come back to discuss it. However, as he is getting older, there is more of a reluctance to "work with Mum". It depends on how desperate (or not) he is to get the work done, whether he will ask for help or not.

I hope you can work out an answer together. Remember though that there will be others who don't have an issue getting into school who do have a problem with homework. Does your son manage to do work in school hours?