Hi I posted on here a few weeks ago.Things are still very difficult. I was visited by a pastoral member of staff and the EWO last week over my daughter's school attendance. She is currently in year 9.They suggested I speak to the doctor about a hospital school inthe area which I have done but I have not had a reply yet so I don't know if they would take her.The pastoral leader said that she doesn't feel the school can carry on with her the way she is as often when she does turn up she won't go into lessons.I thought they were being supportive and under standin but this weekend we have had a letter saying that her attendance will be rev iewed weekly and if it doesn't improve we will have to attend a School Attendance Panel Meeting.We really are at our wits end they know I do all I can to get her there.Does anyone have any experience of these meetings-what is likely to happen?

Thank you
Theresa

Dear Theresa,

Panels sound terrifying and daunting - and they can be if you are not prepared - which the other panel members will be.

So, start planning. If you have not already kept notes and records of all the meetings that you have attended, go through your diary and note down where you have been, who you saw and what was said.

If you did keep notes, then sort through them looking for key issues raised both by 'them' and yourself, and review actions taken from them.

If not supplied, ask for copies of minutes from key meetings.

Be calm, and in control - do not let others dominate the proceedings. This is meant to be a joint affair, both 'sides' working for the benefit of your child.

The state is required to provide education for your child, just as you are required to ensure she is educated. This does not have to be in your local school, though often this will be the best place for all concerned. My daughter was, for a time, taught in a special school few know about 20 miles from our home. This undoubtedly helped her re-start learning. We also managed to get a few tutoring sessions arranged, though with child protection issues, this is more difficult now as they often want these to be in the school, which is where the problem lies. My point here is that there are alternatives - with budget implications which makes it difficult to get them onto the discussion table at meetings.

This can be very stressful and divisive in the family, so you need to stay strong for your child, and for all the family - and come back here for support. There is a great bunch of people here upon whom I came to rely.

For them, my update is that the final stage of my daughter's degree course is next week. She has done well to make it this far, but now we're nervous about the result!

Yours aye,

Simon

Hi Simon thank you so much for your reply it has helped to know what might lie ahead.I will post again when I know more.Also many congratulations to your daughter on getting her degree result you must be so proud and relieved!

Hi Theresa

I will back all that Simon has said. And what I also found was in my favour was to dress up somewhat and have a folder in your hand when you arrive and take down notes. They will treat you better if you look in control.
And remember, you are doing all you can. They might want to blame but remember, they are not in your shoes and don't really know what you are going through.

If you can, early in the meeting, see if you can spot one of them who seems a bit more understanding and make them the one you look at if you find yourself becoming flustered.
My first meetings like this, I felt overwhelmed, but then when I dressed up and walked in with a black folder (which had notes and photocopies) they seemed to listen better and I didn't even have to pull things out of th folder.

The other thing I found helped was saying to them " what are you going to do to help?" Because as Simon has mentioned, the education department is also supposed to fulfil their end of the bargain when you have done all you can.

Good luck, hold your head high. Listen carefully to what they have to say but then say all you need to say and request.
Let us know hiow you go
Take care
Linda

Ps and Simon - that is good news indeed. I can see that the sense of sitting on th edge and waiting for outcomes is probably something that will never leave us as parents of kids who have struggled to attend school. Hope all goes well