Hi everyone

I am hoping you are all actually enjoying your summer break and not having to seek help from the forum!!
But just in case any one is reading. Does anyone have any advice on how to motivate a 15 year old to do school work at home?

We've done this huge move from not attending/being enrolled at school to now having the situation where my son is supposed to be working on line at home and it just isn't happening. He has done a couple of fairly good days but this week is the worst where so far three out if four days are just like the times he used to refuse to go to school!! He won't get up in the morning and when he does get up at about midday, he insists on having a shower and takes about another two hours...saying he is going for a shower and not going and then finally going and taking forever in there and then doing his hair etc. by 4pm he is ready to do some work or at least has run out of excuses ...but then he can't focus......so it just doesn't happen. So I am again highly stressed and get to the point that I can't stand to be in th house with him...watching the procrastination take over any rational thought...sometimes stepping in and falling out....other times just trying to ignore the delay and hope he starts to take the responsibility. He says he is depressed and this behaviour does indicate this is the case. I think he feels very isolated and even though he didn't like mixing with his peers when he did attend school....he had conversations that teenagers have and at least some interaction.

So how do we as parents help them to move forward when they are stuck at home? Do we try to force them? Do we step back and let them find their way? What can we do? I feel helpless in the light of the fact that at his age now he is quite defiant and thinks anything I suggest is rubbish!!
Any ideas or advice for things I can try to stop this spirally downhill further?
Thanks
Linda

Hi Linda
nearly a month later i've just logged on so how are things going?
Hopefully by now your son has found his routine and is doing some study.

I feel for those who are trying to do thier work at home. it has to be difficult to get the head down and study without a teacher standing over you encouraging every step.

i hope things are looking up for him, and you.

Take care

Virginia

hi Virginia

Thanks for your reply. I gather most Of UK is still in holiday?
Still struggling with my sin, unfortunately. He is now 4 weeks behind on his work and hasn't sent in any maths or Wnglish as he hasn't got to the end of the first week's work. He looks busy, he is doing work when I check but he is working very very slow and it is impossible to get him to start before lunch.
I think that he is also suffering with the anxiety and depression in different ways now that he doesn't have the distraction of trying to or attending school. He has incredible procrastination and seems to have some possible OCD tendencies, or it is the procrastination, not sure. But we are talking about procrastination and avoidance that can last hours and involves putting off going for a shower and starting the school work and going to bed.
So it is on going....always hope something is round the corner and off to the psychiatrist again next week.
How is it all going with your daughter now?
take care
Linda