Hi my D is 15 and dx with ASD and recently. Depression and Body Dysmorphic Disorder. She is bright and until a few years ago very sporty. She has some friends at school and a few outside but still struggles with socialising. For part of last academic year she barely attended school. Nonetheless she managed to get 4 GCSEs in year 10. The school were very unhelpful. Despite numerous complaints they rarely sent any work home. As she was never away from school for 15 straight days she was not according to the EWO entitled to any tutoring. We paid for a small amount ourselves.

We are now a few months into year 11 and things are falling apart. She has anxiety due to her ASD and BDD. She sometimes manages to get into school to a room they let her use but frequently can't get into a classroom. Despite being in school they seem to expect her to self teach. Sometimes she will be given work after the lesson rarely during it. Today she called me crying and just wanting to leave. I attended the school and met with her mentor who is lovely but a head of subject and a full time teacher and so doesn't have time to run around school getting work. I said they need to think outside the box and can't just leave her in a room without any support. The deputy head advised me that they have no available TAs. I asked about her taking part in lessons by Skype on that room. That doesn't seem possible.

She was seen by the ED Psych in September and we are waiting for that to apply for an EHCplan. I just feel as though they just want me to take her home so they can forget about her.

She wants to study neuroscience at uni. She is bright enough but I can't see how we can keep going like this. An EHCplan takes 20 weeks. She will have taken her GCSEs by then!

She starts specialist cbt for her BDD early next year. She is changing meds to see if that helps. Interhigh looks an option if she becomes a total refuser.

Any ideas? We are in London

Hi Londonmum

Welcome to the forum.
It sounds like you have been going through a pretty tough time.
So annoying snd so wrong when the school is not helpful. You are actually entitled to tutoring as it is an 'illness' and this covers physical and mental health. But some schools choose how they interpret that. If you are able to keep pushing them, they might give in.

I don't have an answer for you but you seem to be doing all the right things. Someone else on here might know of some support in London. I presume you have been in touch with Parent partnership or their new name. They can offer some good advice or let you know what is available locally.
Hang in there...some support will turn up in some form. Keep pushing the school or follow up with education authorities re what you are entitled to. Schools are just not for all kids. If your daughter is truly unhappy then there does come a time when keep pushing to make the current situation work is not worth it. And schools do end up being very isolating for those who find it overwhelming.
Take care and let us know how you are going.
Linda

Hi Londonmum

Parent Partnership is now Support4SEND. See website below.

http://www3.hants.gov.uk/support4SEND

Linda

Thanks Linda. I have a meeting today at her school as things haven't improved. Where do I find the legal bits for backing up their obligation to provide work and tutoring? I'm in the uk thanks

Hi Londonmum

The information is on the UK government site, under schools statutary guidance. I tried cutting and pasting but it didn't work, so am typing here for you and hope I have it correct:
www.gov.uk/collections/statutary-guidance-schools
Have a look on there and under the heading 'Alternative provision'. There is a document or pdf file you can read.
It outlines ehat schools must do if a child cannot attend mainstream school.
Let me know if you trouble accessing the info.
Hope this helps.
Sorry to hear things have not improved.
Let us know how you go.
Linda