Here I am again on another ranting phases ..... sleep is a major issue with my son as he's not going to school as tried from staying awake all night. I've tired to explain to him that he needs to get back on track and go to school so that he gets a good night sleep the more he is refusing school the more the cycle is growing. I'm on my own and have to work so means leaving him in the afternoon for a while then he just lays in bed and sleeps so we are back to square one again!!! School been out. CAMHS involved still feeling frustrated with the whole thing u

Hi Hevs

My daughter has spend the last year or 2 sleeping endlessly, and not being able to sleep at night. I am a single parent so I had no alternative but to leave her at home (which I did ladened with guilt).

I have discussed this with my daughter several times, CAMHS will put it all down to phones etc but this is not the issue, they are simply trying to pass time, block everything out as they feel so low.

It is really frustrating as you know all they need to do is set a new sleep pattern which will take about 2 weeks to reverse the hours they currently spend. Whilst we can tell them this repeatedly they will not change this unless they want to. My daughter if she planned to go to school, would stay awake all night the night before worrying with anxiety about not being able to wake up...a recipe for disaster!

My daughter would go to sleep around 3-4 in morning and wake up around 2pm, I would be home at 4pm and she would probably fall asleep again at some point before I go to bed, then the circuit started again. the problem with them sleeping in the day is when they wake up they are alone and this just feeds low mood.

My daughter says she would know the night before whether the next day would be a good or bad day - if she woke feeling bad - there was no point trying - and when she did it normally ended badly or she made it end badly (self sabotage) .

Self sabotage was always part of my daughters life - even if she was really looking forward to something she would make sure that it did not happen - again fear / avoidance ruling her decisions, likewise she would often ask for something completely unattainable, knowing I would say no just to have a fight - exhausting behavior - although this reaction has now stopped.

So in short no amount of nagging will change the sleeping, i have tried encouraging activity, sport etc...but it really is down to how they feel. My daughter slept through 3 nights in a row this week and is finaly fighting to stay awake every evening AND starting to attend school again and she might just believe what i have been telling her - but it was a VERY LONG TIME COMING so all you can do is listen, encourage and support and find diversions of interest to them.
k x